Seen outside Gibson’s, practically my favorite store on Planet Earth:

Hide & Carry: ALL DAMSEL / NO DISTRESS

How could I not navigate over to its website, if only to see the handbag beauty behind the brains that came up with the tagline for concealed-carry couture. One bag is called the Aphrodite, so if you’re feeling mythical and want to make sure no bad demigods toy with your immortality, this is the accessory for you. One of the most popular items is an evening shoulder bag, available in black or tan leopard. So if you’re at the Cailloux Theater listening to the symphony, and during intermission some joker tries to make a move on your tailgate, you go all cross-body with your .38 special and pump him full of timpani.

This is Texas, and if you can’t be deadly and look dressed-to-kill, well then, you best be on your way back to Oklahoma.